By Elizabeth R. Auma K, Trade Policy Leader/Bridging Policy, People & Purpose/ Founder, Hearts& Trade 

I have worked with women in boardrooms, at borders, in markets, in faith ministries, and with women simply trying to navigate their way through life. Some lead highly technical negotiations. Some lead political delegations. Others carry goods and babies under the scorching sun. Yet across this wide range of experience, I observe that many of these women are still being asked to choose between home and career or business.

When I had my first baby and then the next, and the next, I found myself at that same crossroad. It was not pressure from outside, but from within. It becomes real every time a little one arrives on this earth. The look on their faces reflects a daily longing for a mother’s presence. Yet for a working woman, systems and structures often allow you to be fully present for only a limited period of time. That is, if one is fortunate enough to have a job or a steady source of income that offers even that small window to nurture tomorrow’s businessman or woman. I recall a friend who, after years of praying for twins, was blessed with them. Yet barely a week after delivery, she was expected to return to work. She had to make a difficult choice, and she chose to leave her job. Many may not be fortunate enough to have the choice of leaving the job. In barely a week, they are back on the hustle lane looking for another meal. Many women face such crossroads because of the circumstances before them.  The difficult question continues to play in their minds. Should I stay home, or do I continue to build my career or business?

For others, it is not about children but the weight of society’s expectations- whether one can be a good wife or mother while also being a successful career woman or businesswoman. I have observed that women in deeply rooted cultural settings often feel more restrained in expressing themselves compared to those who are more exposed and educated. Some find themselves forced into a choice between being intellectual or intimate, career-driven or home-centered.

There was a period in my career when I worked closely with women at the Busia and Malaba, Uganda-Kenya borders, and the Katuna, Uganda-Rwanda border. Many of them were involved in small-scale cross-border trade. Daily, they carried goods on their heads and often their babies on their backs under the scorching sun. Despite the long hours and physical effort, the income they took home still fell below the poverty line. Their participation in trade was not driven by the fact that they wanted to become the next billionaires but by survival. Even then, meeting basic needs remained a daily struggle. It was a sight that daily reminded me that trade facilitation must go beyond the movement of goods and services. It must consider the lived realities of the men and women behind the trade. To someone who may not fully understand these realities, it can be easy to suggest that such women should remain at home and care for their children. But for many, that option simply does not exist.

On the other hand, for women in professional spaces whose struggles may not be as visible, there is a different tension. The fear of becoming hardened in the pursuit of a career, and the concern that success may come at the cost of their homes, is real. Whether in boardrooms or at border points, her story offers a similar cry for guidance.

I believe that asking a woman to choose between nurturing her home and expressing her full potential beyond its walls limits what God has placed within her.

This draws me to the Proverbs 31 woman.

She teaches today’s woman how to navigate the tensions of balancing home and her assignment beyond the walls of her home.  The Proverbs 31 woman did not lose her identity as a wife or a mother in expressing herself outside her home. She did not compete with her husband or other men or attempt to become one. Instead, she revealed the fullness of womanhood: multi-talented, strong, wise, industrious, and dignified.

Her role extended beyond the home, yet her home remained a place of honor. Her life reflected balance, purpose, and impact, and both her household and the wider community praised her. I believe that at home, she was a wife and a mother and not the Chief Executive Officer.

The Proverbs 31 woman shows us that it is possible to carry multiple roles and still retain the beauty of being a woman. The tension of excelling in one area at the expense of another can be addressed through a deeper reflection on the life of the Proverbs 31 woman, whose success is attributed to the fear of God.

We may not be and do all that she did, but she reminds us that we can become all that God has purposed us to be in this generation. Therefore, as women navigating boardrooms, homes, markets, and ministries, we must ask ourselves:

• Are we becoming the women God has called us to be?
• Are we releasing the beauty and strength of womanhood into the world?
• Are we remaining grounded in who we are, even when the odds are against us?

If a woman can be trusted to carry and nurture a life, then surely God can trust her to serve a global market.